Does Technology Help or Hurt?

I spent most of the last two days looking through people's blogs and facebook and texting. It was through a text that I found out a friend died, a baby was lost, and that people are "OK". Through blogs and facebook I found out how others are dealing with the painful events of the last two days; the death of friend, the loss of a baby and the anniversary of a child's death. While going though blogs and facebook gives me an incite into how people are dealing with their pain, I start to wonder about the old fashion of finding this information out. Meeting face to face to talk about it. We need to have personal emotional connections. Is talking face to face better or worse? Sometimes the pain is too great to discuss it openly and this is where blogging and texting makes it easier to share the news and feelings without the agony of telling that person in person. It can be too difficult to talk about while holding back tears and exposing our raw emotions. We somehow feel that we shouldn't show that much emotion with other people. That it is somehow wrong to show how much you are hurting when you see others hurting even more around you. It's difficult to show that you are scared and feel hopeless when you are supposed to be stronger than that... So maybe blogging is a way for people to release their feelings of pain, hurt, and anger all the while still guarding themselves. I know it is easier for me to type how I am feeling through my tears and anguish than to talk about it. I still can't mention Andy without crying and if I have to tell someone, even through the phone, a huge lump gathers in my throat, and I can barely get the words out. It hurts to think of the lost babies. But somehow writing it is less painful...somehow it makes it just that tiny bit better to share a lit bit of ourselves with written words rather than brokenhearted spoken ones. So share your emotions and your pain in person to those closest to you and don't be afraid to share your raw emotions since it is necessary to have these personal connections but also let others in your life through the key stokes on your keypad... Everyone deals differently with grief and however you chose to deal with it and share it, whether it is in person or in a blog, it's the right way...as long as you are not bottling your emotions. Getting your emotions out through any means is the most important...

Gone too soon...

I am crying as I write this. Our friend Andy lost his battle with cancer today. He was 34. He has a loving wife and two small children, A.J who is 4 and Alex who is 1. He found out he had cancer less than four months ago and a little over a month ago found out there was no hope for a cure, the cancer spread too much. It just seems so random. He had no family history of cancer of any kind. He was an otherwise healthy active police officer. I had another friend, Mike, who died last year May 19th; also from cancer and also 34 years old. He never got the chance to get married (he bought an engagement ring right before his diagnosis) or have children. I don't know which is worse... Is anyone safe? It makes you appreciate the people in your life who care and are there for you whether there are family or friends. I can't image the pain Jaime is going through. The anger, the hurt, the worry for her future for her children. I wish I could help somehow but I feel that no matter what I do or say it won't help much. Each person grieves differently. I bought her some books for her and her children on dealing with death of a spouse or parent and I hope they provide the smallest of help. She has a lot of family and friends who really care and will be there to support her but it is still not fair. For those who read this please pray for Andy's soul and for Jaime and her boys to have the strength to endure this tragic loss...

Master Chef in Training

Emma is really enjoying playing in her new kitchen. We bought her this great looking walk-in kitchen (yes it even has a "wooden" floor!). It came with all the pots and pans and play food, etc. She likes opening up the cabinets and cooking up a storm. Emma set up a stool for me, made me sit and pretend to eat her food. She served me coffee and bread with fruit. She then put a stuffed gorilla at the table and fed him....I must say I thought that came when kids are a bit older but I guess too is not too young to pretend after all. We just hope she enjoys it as much a month down the road as she does now. I certainly had nothing remotely like this as a child and I just want her to appreciate the things she is given and not take things for granted. What every mother wants I guess. We want our children to have everything we didn't but at the same time we don't want them to be spoiled. Time will tell....

Daycare Birthday Celebration!

Today we celebrated Emma's birthday at daycare with some friends and a cake. The daycare is nice enough to make a cake for each child on their birthday. The parents can come and celebrate with their children. Emma was a bit tired from her exhausting day yesterday so I let her sleep in this morning and went to work late. She didn't nap too long probably because of the time change so she wasn't her usual chipper self at this celebration. She did like her cake but was not too excited when we sang happy birthday. We also took a photo of the group eating their cake and of Emma with her teachers. Traci is the one on the left. She is Emma's primary teacher. Tonjah is the one on the right and she is the other teacher in the room but Emma really likes her. She is full of energy and loves music. When we took her photo with the teachers she got little teary eyed because I had walked away from her. But she quickly got over it when she was blowing her horn or telling mom or dad to do it. We later celebrated further at home by playing in her new kitchen and then going out to eat at Outback Steakhouse. We haven't been there in ages but Emma really enjoyed it. She loved dipping the prime rib in the aujou.

Celebrating Emma's 2nd Birthday!

We celebrated Emma's 2nd Birthday with a small family party (well it ended up being 19 people so I guess we are not such a small family after all). Had some good food, nice home baked goods and a cake from a bakery that Emma ate and liked. Emma ended sleeping through the dinner portion. We blamed it on the time change. Hey she maybe two tomorrow but she still needs those naps to get enough energy for the party! I hope everyone relaxed a bit, had some nice food, and enjoyed Emma's birthday. Emma really liked playing with the balloons and ended up ripping some decorations of the wall. Overall, it went pretty well and she enjoyed herself and so did we. I can't believe my baby is two years old already. When did that happen....

Having Fun with Aunt Ewa

Adam's sister is back in the US for a while visiting from Poland. She has stayed with us previously but somehow I have not taken any photos. She will be staying with us for the remainder of the week to watch Emma Wed when we go to Andy's benefit and help me prepare for Emma's small 2nd Birthday gathering on Sunday. Adam picked Aunt Ewa up from his parents tonight after work and they were home in time for dinner of homemade chicken wings, pasta and a cooked veggie medley.
After dinner I put a shelf organizer in my Tupperware cabinet and Emma played with dad. After I was done, she played with her Aunt Ewa. She especially liked the piggy back ride. When Ewa played with Emma in the basement, Emma "convinced" Aunt Ewa to bring her Lion walker upstairs. Aunt Ewa still has to learn that saying no is OK. However, if you promise to do something just know Emma is too smart to forget it or get distracted by other things. She will remember that promise and hold you to it even before she turns 2!

Emma Goes Potty

So I have mentioned that Emma is really starting to take interest in potty training. She has been asking to go by saying "Siu Siu" which means pee pee and has gone successfully more often than not. She has a potty and then we also have a seat insert to go on the regular toiled which she actually prefers probably because she feels like a big girl.
I took a few cute photos of her to share which I am sure will some day mortify her.
The problem now is that she likes it so much that once she gets on the potty she doesn't want to get off. It takes up to a half hour to coax her off. It's the worst before bath times. Not sure on how to deal with that one yet. Hopefully the more she goes the less of a novelty it will become and the potty trips will get shorter.
In case you are wondering, Emma is wearing a mismatched outfit because I took her sledding in the freezing blistering cold so I needed a warmer top than the one she was wearing. We did get hit by a major storm that cancelled my job today so after cleaning the upstairs, eating lunch, going potty, we went sledding around the neighborhood for almost an hour. Don't worry she was really bundled up and quite warm I assure. All you could see were her eyes...

Braving the cold to feed some ducks, pigeons, and geese.

We celebrated the first of March, 2009 by going to the park to feed the ducks, geese, and some uninvited pigeons. We have done this at least 3 times before. Emma used to be scared, especially of the large geese (As you can see they are almost as big as she is!) but now she is much braver and lets them eat directly from her hand. She keeps asking for more bread so she can throw it at them. She especially likes it when they catch the bread midair. It makes her laugh. It was bitter cold and lightly snowing but we decided to go anyway since we are not sure when Emma will go outside to play in the near future. We in for another storm coming in tonight into tomorrow;8-15 inches of snow! I don't know how I will make it into work tomorrow and I have to. Emma's parent teacher conference is tomorrow.